First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
