You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
