you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I just found a bag of teeth...
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
