Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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