i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
