Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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