After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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