For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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