wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Randomize
