Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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