she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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