Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
