He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
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