It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
