quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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