Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize