i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
