shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
if i died would you start the facebook group?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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