new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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