there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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