so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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