kristin has been a bad kristin
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
