Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm sobbing to NWA
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
