what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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