I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
