Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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