Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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