Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
