There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize