My room smells like vodka and shame
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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