she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
