She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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