yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
