im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
that may or may not have been my penis.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
