bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
