You made me cry and you don't even care
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
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