This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Sorry about my life...
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Randomize
