omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
