Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
