haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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