This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize
