Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Randomize
