I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Randomize
