windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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