I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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