Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
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