Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
