but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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