If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
