I think my vagina is haunted
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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