Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
